Leaving
I usually sleep uninterrupted but today I had a bad dream and when I woke up all that was in my head was the realisation that I was leaving Australia in 3 days. For some reason it never hit me before. I feel sick, and scared, and sad. It feels different this time around: when I left the UK I knew I was coming back, I knew that I had all my things there, waiting for me, some kind of investment in the country that kept me feeling like it wasn’t goodbye. When I leave here I’m cashing in my chips and leaving nothing, and that feels strange.
When something comes to an end it’s only natural to miss everything that was good about it. I just wish that the happiness I feel that those things existed in the first place was a stronger feeling than the sadness I feel about losing them.
Apologies for the uncharacteristically sad post. I’ll be back on form by the time I hit Thailand.